Well, I finally made zucchini pasta …

Tonight’s mission: attempt a pasta dish with zucchini strips replacing traditional pasta and make it appetizing enough to be wordpress and instagram brag-worthy.

The idea: clean-ish Alfredo sauce with coconut cream, mushrooms, and bacon.

And it was terrible! 

How is it that those videos on Facebook make it look so damn easy! Sure the consistency was good and the texture was pleasant, yet, there was really something lacking! Maybe the coconut cream was overkill? Excessive mushrooms? Surely bacon can’t be a negative contributor to the cause … Hmmm maybe I should go back to the drawing board on this one!

Here’s the scoop:

3 bacon rashes, chopped

One clove of garlic, chopped

2 handfuls of assorted mushrooms, chopped

1 350ml tin coconut cream

2 large zucchini, finely peeled into long strips using a potato peeler

Step 1: I got the frying pan fired up with the garlic and chopped bacon (and a teaspoon of coconut oil for frying). This was about medium-high on the hawt scale. That took roughly 10 minutes. Electric cooker. Work with me people.

Step 2: added the chopped mushrooms and gently tossed around the pan for about a minute. It was pretty damn fragrant by then, I was really starting to enjoy myself!

Step 3: vigorously shake up the coconut cream tin, get the juices going and an even consistency. I’m not dealing with that half-ass liquid BS. Open and pour into frying pan, reduce heat to low and gently stir around that sexy bacon/shroom mix. Allow to thicken for roughly 5 minutes.

Step 4: I actually seasoned at this point (wrong move/right move – you decide) before adding the zucchini strips and gently combining.

Step 5: allow to get saucier than Shakiras Bachata video (which I saw yesterday and dammnnnnnnn!) for approx 2-3 minutes.
Step 6: parmy up and eat. Should be pretty simple right?

Correct answer: WRONG!

Thick, heavy, sickly sweet and with a badass after taste. This will not be a combo I will be trying again anytime soon! 

I’m even thinking next time I’ll go with a basic aglio olio pepperoncino base and build from there. The green zucchini sure looked sexy swirling around in the cream though … it’s ok to say that right?

Over to you, have you attempted this new craze? How did you go? And what tips can you share for this young padawan? Let me know.

In the meantime I’m going out for pizza instead!

DJ NP spinning the mushroom mix
This is … zucchini pasta
Mushroom and bacon hangs
Cream and zucchini added … Pedicure time girlfriend! Yes, that’s an italian flag apron … it was my nonna’s haters.
The final product LOOKS almost good enough to eat!
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